Recently when I was meditating with my eyes closed in a dark room, I saw a white light that got brighter and brighter. Eventually it felt like I was staring at the sun.
Looking at this make-believe light prompted an insight: So many people describe seeing a bright white light when they’re dying because it’s the first time they stopped to notice it. That light is always there, trying to glow into our lives, but we’re too busy with our distractions and pursuits to notice.
I have been using my meditation time to work on the notion of letting go of the past. If someone hurt me in the past or I made mistakes, it’s time to move on. I can learn from those experiences while not dwelling on resentment or regret. If I behaved in a certain way because I felt it helped me in an earlier phase of my life, I don’t need to continue that behavior if it no longer serves me.
Oh, Master grant that I may never seek
So much to be consoled as to console
To be understood as to understand
To be loved as to love with all my soul.
John and I recently committed to going to the gym three times a week, which requires making that a priority in our planning. Likewise, meditation required making a decision that my mental health is important enough to make time.
