Tag: marriage


My husband has helped me become a better person

My husband has helped me become a better person

We just celebrated 21 years of marriage John and I got married 21 years ago today. I can confidently say I love him more today than I did back then. One of the reasons I love him more is that I love me more – and that’s in part because he’s helped me grow into a happier, healthier, more loving and generous…

What kind of love do you love?

What kind of love do you love?

Getting clear on what you need can help you teach your loved ones what to do for you And you thought the Bernie memes were done … What is your ideal Valentine? If you watch Valentine’s Day ads, you would assume every woman is pining for roses, diamonds and a car. If they are moms in pandemic, they might actually just want…

Intimacy and passion are different, advises couples therapist Esther Perel

Intimacy and passion are different, advises couples therapist Esther Perel

My fabulous British journalist friend Jane Mulkerrins travels the globe interviewing celebrities (Kevin Kline, Liv Tyler, Billy Bob Thornton, Tilda Swinton, Victoria’s Secret models … it goes on and on) but that’s not all she does. She recently interviewed Esther Perel, a couples therapist in New York. The headline on Jane’s article in the Telegraph tells you this is going to be good reading:…

How to Make a Marriage Work, reblog from Leo Babauta of Zen Habits

How to Make a Marriage Work, reblog from Leo Babauta of Zen Habits

My husband, John, and I celebrated our 14-year wedding anniversary this week, which had us reflecting on our gratitude for our happy marriage and what we think we’ve learned since we first said, “I do.” Just a few days before our anniversary, Leo Babauta included the following tips in his email newsletter, Zen Habits. I thought it was perfect timing, better…

Learning how to show your love instead of just saying I love you

Learning how to show your love instead of just saying I love you

Do you remember that exhilarating feeling the first time someone you adored said those magic words, “I love you?” And do you remember the gut-wrenching feeling the first time you realized that someone who’d been throwing around the L word didn’t really love you? At least, not in the way you needed? How you demonstrate your love matters. John and…

Blogversation 2012: When have you had an a-ha moment about your life?

Blogversation 2012: When have you had an a-ha moment about your life?

Throughout this year, several bloggers will engage in a conversation here and on their blogs — asking questions of each other and responding. Others are absolutely welcome to join the conversation, as well. Learn more about the ladies of Blogversation 2012. Today’s question comes from your hostess, Colleen (@cnewvine on Twitter) — inspired by Lara Zielin (@larazielin). When have you…

Blogversation 2012: What's your best relationship advice?

Blogversation 2012: What's your best relationship advice?

Throughout this year, several bloggers will engage in a conversation here and on their blogs — asking questions of each other and responding. Others are absolutely welcome to join the conversation, as well. Learn more about the ladies of Blogversation 2012. We’re rotating through the Blogversation participants a second time, with each blogger posing a question to the others and…

Blogversation 2012: What's your favorite blog post?

Blogversation 2012: What's your favorite blog post?

Throughout this year, several bloggers will engage in a conversation here and on their blogs — asking questions of each other and responding. Others are absolutely welcome to join the conversation, as well. Learn more about the ladies of Blogversation 2012. We kicked off this online salon a few weeks back, so the Blogversationists are still getting to know each…

38 Things I Have Learned at 38, by Amy Spooner

38 Things I Have Learned at 38, by Amy Spooner

I love that the contributions to the “Things I Have Learned” series keep coming in. I asked a small number of my writer friends to participate at the outset, but now the majority of participants have volunteered themselves and that’s fantastic. Keep ’em coming, all! Today’s list comes from Amy Spooner, who I met when she profiled me for the…

I am a trend setter — NY Times on couples sleeping apart

I am a trend setter — NY Times on couples sleeping apart

In my fantasy world, someone from the New York Times read my blog post about the challenges some couples face trying to share a bed and thought, “That’s brilliant! We should write about that!” It could have happened.* My friend Lisa Gauchey pointed out a recent Times story headlined Married, but Sleeping Alone. The marital bed, once the symbol of…

What if you're in a bad romance because of you?

What if you're in a bad romance because of you?

Say what you will about pop phenom Lady Gaga, the woman can write a catchy tune. More than a week ago, I heard one of her songs at a neighborhood sushi restaurant and I’m still finding myself singing Bad Romance. [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qrO4YZeyl0I] An excellent (if very long) article in the Washington Post recently was headlined: The Marriage Myth: Why do so…

Nothing motivates a journalist like a deadline

Nothing motivates a journalist like a deadline

A friend recently lost his wife. She was just 47 when she was hit by a car and died.
After getting a divorce a few years back, my friend had remarried and was as giddy as a high school girl talking about his new wife. His eyes twinkled when he talked about her influence on his health, his home and his outlook on life.
I never met his new wife, but my heart gets hot and my eyes tear up when I think about these two people just having found each other, then having it suddenly, unexpectedly, end.

Paying the rent is just one way of taking care of your spouse

Paying the rent is just one way of taking care of your spouse

Much fuss was made over the January release of a Pew Research Center study showing women’s incomes had grown much faster than men’s from 1970 to 2007. Women increasingly have more education and make more money than their husbands, the headlines shouted. Can V-Day survive shifting roles? For some women who earn more than their husbands, more money means more…